Wow.
It’s been awhile since I blogged. It’s been a difficult few weeks for my family and I. I haven’t spoken about my health on the blog yet and I guess I had made a conscious decision to do that. It had been one area of my life where all of my health issues hadn’t affected things. It felt like an area I had somehow preserved and kept safe and managed to keep “untainted”. Well, there went that-- or so it feels.
If being sick-- really sick-- is hard... the only thing harder in my opinion... is being sick and being a mom (in my case, a bonus mom). I put a lot of pressure on myself to do things RIGHT. I want to be the BEST bonus mom I can be. I want to do it the right way, the best way, all the time. I am by far my toughest critic. So when my health gets in my way, be that a cold that has me not wanting to do that crafty activity I had promised, or skin cancer biopsies that have me feeling not quite myself, or a new seizure disorder that has me having seizures multiple times a weekend (or day) and feeling all sorts of like crap, I do not exactly consider it a valid excuse to let my parenting responsibilities go. That’s been what my life has been like the past few months. Well... truthfully... since August 2012. It just has been progressively getting worse, and worse and worse. And the doctors are continually getting more and more and more perplexed. And my bonus kiddos are progressively getting more and more and more confused and frustrated as to why their bonus mom isn’t her “fun” and/or “normal” self.
Lately we’d been making some headway with some specialists and getting some tests done and we thought we were getting some answers, and then, in the last couple of weeks the seizures really ramped up. And then this past weekend, I started having some cardiac issues-- serious cardiac issues, and spent a good 12 hours in the Emergency Room having many tests done with some very wonderful, but very concerned doctors and nurses (not to mention one very concerned Hubinator!).
So this brings me to this post. I went on a bit of a hiatus for a little while (a couple weeks), but I’m back :). Truthfully, this blog brings me joy. It gives me something that I can still do, despite the limitations I have upon myself, and that feels good. And, now that I have opened up as to this ultra personal part about myself … I can also blog about what it’s like to be a bonus mom who is also struggling with some health issues in her life... because lets face it-- that’s not easy, and there are a number of mom’s out there (bonus and bio) … and dads for that matter... who are dealing with those challenges everyday!
Happy Mid-February Everyone! I’m glad to be back and I’m looking forward to the next posts! I have some fun ones planned for us!
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